Cyber vs. Real

I'm a social media nut. No need to the name 'em you know what i'm talking about.

Through these social sites I've made some friends. some really valuable friends. Friends that I would not have made if it were not for these sites. Doesn't matter to me how I refer to them by their twitter name like, @bigsant, @shafunnyxl or @kpett. They are still my friends.

One of my "real life" friends pointed this out to me the other day. She said " I haven't talked to you in a week! What' up with that? I called and u didn't even return my calls! but I saw you on facebook posting back and forth with some dude from Miami!"

She was mad. Hurt even. At first I wanted to be like "Ugh! get over it! join in! DO SOMETHING!"
Instead I said "My bad, homey."

I talked to her for about 30 mins, til one of my cyber friends text me "Call me. I need to talk to you. quick"

I knew what the text was about so i told my "real life" homegirl, I'd call her back, cause my mom just beeped in. So after I put out the fire with my cyber friend, I took a minute to think things through.

Do I give my online friends more attention?
Am I really neglecting my friends or are they neglecting me?
Should I try to integrate my friends? Cyber meet real. Real meet Cyber?

Tell me, what how would you handle this type of situation? Do your real life friends get jealous of your online friends or vice versa?

He called me a BITCH!

And I liked it! I think

At the height of passion, on all fours, my mouth slightly open, moaning with delight. I looked at him behind me , sweating dripping, face all screwed. His hands gripping my waist.

The boy was putting in work! I was so intrigued by the faces he was making, my rhythm got thrown off. He looked up at me straight in my eyes, pulled my hair and said

"Turn around Bitch, I got this back here!

I lost my mind. I was shocked, stunned, confused and still in rocking my ass back and forth. I didn't know what to do. What's the protocol? Why didn't I jump up and in my Queen Latifah impersonation say

"Who you calling a Bitch? U-N-I-T-Y"

I liked it! Didn't I?

Just to be sure that I this wasn't a fluke. "Say it again!" I said to him as i looked back a 2nd time. He grinned. "You like that huh?" Silence.

Then he stopped. wiped the sweat from his face. got on top of me, pressing my body deep into my Serta mattress. I could feel his heart beating through my back. The weight of his body, quickened my breaths. He pulled a hand full of my hair tight, twisted my head to 1 side.

he put his lips, to my ear. and he whispered

"you've got mail"

Damn it! I went to sleep watching porn on the internet...AGAIN!

LOL

What will folks say about you when you die?

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is written by Stephen Covey, is a really inspiring read. I'm on the the 3rd habit so far and I must say that it has really introduced some new concepts to me. I've been inspired to change some of my daily habits by reading this book.

It poses a few questions that require a lot of introspection. One of the questions so far that stuck out in my mind were "what do you want people to say about you at your funeral? What type of legacy do you want to leave?" The author wants you to imagine standing at your own funeral looking down on yourself and out to the people that are mourning your death. What are some of the things you would want your Mother, sibling, significant other, coworker etc. to say about you?

I had never really given thought about that, b/c i knew i wouldn't be there to hear it so it didn't really make a difference to me. But this time, I thought deeply about it.

Looking back on my 25 years, I'm a little uneasy about the legacy I would leave behind. There have been some things that I have done and said to people that I'm not proud of and I definitely haven't put sufficient effort into achieving my goals. The people around me know that too. I'd imagine my mom would say something like " Erica was the best daughter i could have asked for. She had her own mind, did her own thing and always tried to keep the peace. I'm so sad to send her home to glory she had so much more she wanted to do but never did." I DON'T WANT THAT.

I want my mom to say "Erica was the best daughter I could have asked for. she had her own min, did her own thing and always tried to keep the peace. She lived a full life at 25, she pursued her dreams and inspired me to do the same."

What would you want people to say about you when you die?