Thinking about....

nothing.

but i'm thinking.

What are you thinking about?

BLUEPRINT 3

I give to you the album cover for..............BLUEPRINT 3!

Ya'll know I ride for Jay! Bout time boo!

I LOVE IT!

Friend in my head

My newest friend in my head. In fact we're BFFs! We laugh and joke, we shop together. She gives me her free swag. We even sing together!!! in my head of course!

Hey Chrissy!

P.S. Go buy her album Epiphany! In stores now!

yeah baby, I like it RAW!

I don't. Pregnancy & STDs don't appeal to me.

EmandLo.com asked the question I have always wanted to know: Is sex with a condom really that bad?

The short answer is YES.

For details on why. Click Here

what kind of foolishness?

What the hell is that? NO really? What is it?
Thanks to www.stuffflypeoplelike.com for the pic of Lady Gaga looking like a damn fool

Emotions make u cry some time.

Births. Deaths. Marriages. Divorces. New jobs. New job losses. Gain a friend. Lose a Friend

Different emotions for every situation. sometimes situations come at you so fast that your emotions get intermixed.

Shit life makes you cry sometimes.

PASS THE KLEENEX

Click

I'm still me!

Over the last few days, some of my friends have been complaining about my "somber", "unordinary" "boring ass" mood.

Usually, I'm total opposite of those words. One of my friends said this and I quote "Ugh! Why the hell u talking like that? Where's my goofy girl? I can't take this sour attitude! Call me when the real Erica stand up!" and click! The dial tone was buzzing.

WTF? Don't u hate it when folks don't let you feel?

I can't stand when folx try to cut your emotions short. Sometime you just need to be in the space you're in to feel it, and come to terms with it. If not, you're just gonna go back to your original emotion sooner or later.

yeah, I know I have a sour ass attitude. Right now my life is sour. Shit happens. My sour attitude is for the fact, that I'm LOST! I can't see the forest for the trees. I see every little thing that is wrong but i can't see my way out of it.

wouldn't that make u sour?

I know they just want me to be happy, so their trying to pull me out of my funk. but I'm resistant. I need to fell this shit and get it outta my system. Then maybe the trees won't be so intimidating.

Cyber vs. Real

I'm a social media nut. No need to the name 'em you know what i'm talking about.

Through these social sites I've made some friends. some really valuable friends. Friends that I would not have made if it were not for these sites. Doesn't matter to me how I refer to them by their twitter name like, @bigsant, @shafunnyxl or @kpett. They are still my friends.

One of my "real life" friends pointed this out to me the other day. She said " I haven't talked to you in a week! What' up with that? I called and u didn't even return my calls! but I saw you on facebook posting back and forth with some dude from Miami!"

She was mad. Hurt even. At first I wanted to be like "Ugh! get over it! join in! DO SOMETHING!"
Instead I said "My bad, homey."

I talked to her for about 30 mins, til one of my cyber friends text me "Call me. I need to talk to you. quick"

I knew what the text was about so i told my "real life" homegirl, I'd call her back, cause my mom just beeped in. So after I put out the fire with my cyber friend, I took a minute to think things through.

Do I give my online friends more attention?
Am I really neglecting my friends or are they neglecting me?
Should I try to integrate my friends? Cyber meet real. Real meet Cyber?

Tell me, what how would you handle this type of situation? Do your real life friends get jealous of your online friends or vice versa?

He called me a BITCH!

And I liked it! I think

At the height of passion, on all fours, my mouth slightly open, moaning with delight. I looked at him behind me , sweating dripping, face all screwed. His hands gripping my waist.

The boy was putting in work! I was so intrigued by the faces he was making, my rhythm got thrown off. He looked up at me straight in my eyes, pulled my hair and said

"Turn around Bitch, I got this back here!

I lost my mind. I was shocked, stunned, confused and still in rocking my ass back and forth. I didn't know what to do. What's the protocol? Why didn't I jump up and in my Queen Latifah impersonation say

"Who you calling a Bitch? U-N-I-T-Y"

I liked it! Didn't I?

Just to be sure that I this wasn't a fluke. "Say it again!" I said to him as i looked back a 2nd time. He grinned. "You like that huh?" Silence.

Then he stopped. wiped the sweat from his face. got on top of me, pressing my body deep into my Serta mattress. I could feel his heart beating through my back. The weight of his body, quickened my breaths. He pulled a hand full of my hair tight, twisted my head to 1 side.

he put his lips, to my ear. and he whispered

"you've got mail"

Damn it! I went to sleep watching porn on the internet...AGAIN!

LOL

What will folks say about you when you die?

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is written by Stephen Covey, is a really inspiring read. I'm on the the 3rd habit so far and I must say that it has really introduced some new concepts to me. I've been inspired to change some of my daily habits by reading this book.

It poses a few questions that require a lot of introspection. One of the questions so far that stuck out in my mind were "what do you want people to say about you at your funeral? What type of legacy do you want to leave?" The author wants you to imagine standing at your own funeral looking down on yourself and out to the people that are mourning your death. What are some of the things you would want your Mother, sibling, significant other, coworker etc. to say about you?

I had never really given thought about that, b/c i knew i wouldn't be there to hear it so it didn't really make a difference to me. But this time, I thought deeply about it.

Looking back on my 25 years, I'm a little uneasy about the legacy I would leave behind. There have been some things that I have done and said to people that I'm not proud of and I definitely haven't put sufficient effort into achieving my goals. The people around me know that too. I'd imagine my mom would say something like " Erica was the best daughter i could have asked for. She had her own mind, did her own thing and always tried to keep the peace. I'm so sad to send her home to glory she had so much more she wanted to do but never did." I DON'T WANT THAT.

I want my mom to say "Erica was the best daughter I could have asked for. she had her own min, did her own thing and always tried to keep the peace. She lived a full life at 25, she pursued her dreams and inspired me to do the same."

What would you want people to say about you when you die?

History repeats itself

Here I go....AGAIN!

Job searching in the Atlanta area is not an easy task. Takes a lot of time and a lot of energy. Because everything is digital now, it's easy and hard to find a job. Easy because you can sit in the comfort of your own home (or in my case the library) and look for jobs. No more going place to place. Hard because there's no more, friendly interaction! I've been on the hiring side before and I hire ppl that I think would mesh well with me and the company I was working for. If the company is only taking applications through their website it's kind of hard to show them what a really good person you are. Hard because, no one puts up bright, neon signs that say "NOW HIRING" they all just say, "visit our website for job opening"

It's hard and grueling but if I want to continue to stay here, I've got to find a job and quick! Wish me luck!!!

Thought for the day.

Life is hard.

How to:

I'm always thinking of things to do. The latest thing I thought about was starting a handbag line. I found some videos at expertvillage.com that tell you how. There are 15 video in this series. Below is the first video. click here for the rest

Starting A Handbag Business: Fabric & Color Sheet -- powered by ExpertVillage.com

8 Bible reasons why a wife must submit to her husband regardless of culture.

Below are the first four, click the link for the other half. Whadyathink?

Creation order:

Man was created first, woman second. "For it was Adam who was first created, and then Eve. " 1 Timothy 2:13

Creation origin:

Man and all creation was created by God directly out of dust, whereas woman was created through the man’s rib. "Then the Lord God formed man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being. " Genesis 2:7 Woman is the only creature not made from dust. Woman derives her origin from Man. "The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. " Genesis 2:22

Man named woman:

Adam named the animals and was to rule over them. "Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. " Genesis 2:19 "rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth." Genesis 1:28 When Eve was brought to Adam, he named her, showing he was to rule over woman as well. "The man said, "This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man."" Genesis 2:23

Delegation principle:

God commanded directly to Adam alone. The prohibition to not eat of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, was made directly by God to Adam. Adam, in turn relayed what God said to Eve. Eve had not yet been created when God told Adam about the forbidden tree. Eve never actually heard God say this direct, but had to trust Adam’s word on the matter. "The Lord God commanded the man, saying, "From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die." Then the Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."" (Genesis 2:16-18)

click here for 5-8

New Movie "Precious"

I watched this movie trailer and could not contain my tears! Powerful shit. Guaranteed to be a great movie. I'll be sure to take my Kleenex with me. I'm a sap!

Co-Produced by Tyler Perry and Oprah Winfrey

What do you think?

In a word....COONIN!
props to stuffflypeoplelike.com where i snatched the picture.

Spencer Pratt is the future of Hip Hop

His words not mine! GTFOH! Read below to see what this fool had to say! Props to Bossip.com (where I found the interview) and Complex.com (where Bossip found it) lol

Complex: Who’s rapping career would you use as a blueprint for yourself?

Spencer Pratt: I think I’m the future of hip-hop. You know, I feel bad for saying that. That’s unfortunate, but that’s a fact. You can’t compare my model of hip-hop with what I’m about to come out with versus anything in the game. You know I’ll take the Diddy route. I’m not a lyrical MC, I’m just like Diddy. Look what it did for him? He is still balling.

And he had the balls to say that he is the "white Jay-z?!?!?! What kinda crack he smoking. The fuggery that comes outta his mouth

Complex: You also said, “I’m like the white Jay-Z.” Would you consider Heidi the white Beyoncé?

Spencer Pratt: A little bit more than the white Beyoncé. Beyoncé had to be built by a group like Destiny’s Child, but Heidi shines solo. I’ll actually give you an exclusive: I could guarantee you Speidi’s [Spencer and Heidi's] “Bonnie & Clyde” version is going to stunt on Jay and B’s version.

Click here to read the entire inteview on complex.com

My New (pg-13)Obesessions

I love music. Any kind. If it moves me, makes me bob my head, then I like it. If you've been here more than once, you know I STAN for Jay-Z! (yeah I said it)! I love that man! My newest crush is Canadian- born phenom, Drake. The boy is GREAT! better than Great! I downloaded his mixtape "So Far, So Gone" and from the first line, I was HOOKED! His flow is slightly Kanye-ish to me but I like it nonetheless. Do yourself a favor and download any of his mixtapes. Besides, the boy is gorgeous!




Next up, is these crazy ass youtube my boy @kpett (that's for twitter, in case u didn't know) put me on! these videos are freaking HILARIOUS! You will laugh your ass off. Below are the a few of the ones I've watched so far! Go visit their website and tell em how much you enjoy em. I did!

--T.I. vs. T.I.P


--South Central Park


--Chopper suit


--GucciMane & OJ da juiceman right now



My third and final obsession is yogurt! As close as a year ago you couldn't pay me to eat yogurt but now I'm tearing it up! I can't get enough of the stuff. I guess my tastebuds have changed! oooh and don't let me put some granola on it! Heaven!

What are some of your obsessions? p.s. i may do some of my x-rated obsessions next week. Stay tuned! lol

Motivation

Grilled Chicken

So I'm reading this book about Branding. Chapter 2- is the Law of Contraction. Narrow your brand, expand your market! Simple. Be a leader in one thing, be known for ONE THING!

I look up from my book and see this commercial:




How the hell kentucky FRIED chicken, gonna have grilled chicken?! This just doesn't make since to me! No one is gonna buy their grilled chicken! They keep doing shit like this and they'll be bankrupt in about 3-4 years!

Learn to Get Pass the Ass!

Over the last couple of days I have been repeating that phrase to a few of my homeboys.

"I wanna leave her but damn her ass is huge!",

"Sex is amazing! She crazy tho"

and here's the kicker:
"I found out last week that she stabbed her ex 13 times with a pen, but her ass is nice!"

SMH Now I know that men have always had a fascination with big booties but lets be real here. Is her ass so nice that you're willing to risk your life? The chick is crazy! Get outta there while u don't have any unnecessary holes in you! That was my advice to him.

Did he listen? Hell no! Can't get past the physical. So I just want to know from you men out there that have been in similar situations: Exactly what are you willing to go through because the girl/guy (i don't judge) has a nice boo-tay?!

How hard is it to GET PASS THE ASS?

For your viewing pleasure, here's a video of my new favorite couple! I love the dynamics b/w Joe and Tahiry! They just seems so damn happy. Loves it! (sidenote: do yourself a favor and go get Padded Room)

Green Living

I recycle paper and plastic and even egg cartons. I turn the lights out when I leave a room. I want to start my own herb garden and I try to buy fruits a vegetables locally.

What are some of the things you are doing to live "green"?

Here's a list I found of ways to live green

Living green doesn't mean you have to wave goodbye to all the niceties and luxuries of modern life. There are plenty of things you can do which will help you to live green without total sacrifice.

1. Re-use: the bags you get every time you shop are good for more than one trip. Re-use them or, better yet, buy a "bag for life" and use that.
2. Re-cycle: you probably already have a recycling collection service. If not, look out for recycling places local to you and drop off your newspapers, bottles, cans, etc next time you are passing. Don't make a special trip though. For larger items, if they're still usable then look up Freecycle for your local area.
3. Eat local produce. Especially if it's bought fresh from a Farmer's Market. You'll notice the difference in taste. And if you buy just what you need (rather than the supersize pack your grocery store normally sells) it probably won't cost much more.
4. Turn unused appliances off at the socket. Standby mode still uses lots of energy. Cut your fuel bills by turning off televisions and other items when they're not in use. That includes your computer's monitor as well.
5. Wash your clothes at a lower temperature. Modern detergents work fine at lower temperatures. Or throw away the detergent in favor of Eco washing balls.
6. Turn down the thermostat in the winter (and turn it up in the summer if you use air-conditioning). One or two degrees difference is barely noticeable, except when the fuel bill arrives.
7. Compost waste if you have a garden, saving on fertilizer cost and giving your plants a treatment they'll love.

You're a cheater? Blame it on your father

During the winter before my wedding, I was on assignment in Sicily, where I met Diego — a photojournalist with black hair, a scruffy beard, and warm brown eyes that could liquefy concrete. He was my guide in Palermo, driving me around the city on his motorcycle. On my last day, as we stood in a bombed-out cathedral — him talking about World War II, me trying to focus on his words — he started inching closer. Another inch. Then a fraction more, and he was in my personal space. The slightest gesture from me would have been an invitation. I froze. I was madly in love with my fiancé, so what the hell was I doing?

The desire to cheat is hardly a new emotion for me. In fact, I can fairly say that if you've dated me, there's a pretty good chance I was unfaithful. (I'm really sorry!) You might even call me a natural-born cheater — and I think I get it from my father.

Henry Pergament was a businessman, entrepreneur, and chemistry genius. By the time I was born, he'd raised several fortunes and had two families and half a dozen children in and out of wedlock. I have memories from my childhood that I wish I didn't: One night when I was about 10, I was at dinner with my sister, my father, and his friend Mike. I overheard my dad say, "What have I been up to? What men are up to when they're not with their wives."

Daily life in my family found my sisters, my mother, and me running around the house like it was a disrupted anthill, my father somewhere offscreen. He worked hard and was often in absentia. But as I started to understand the adult world in increments, I wondered: Was he with another woman when he could be home teaching me to take a picture/drive a stick shift/make potato pancakes?

In the fall of 1991, I flew back to boarding school in California from our home in New York; my father had driven me to the airport. Once at my dorm, I called home, and my mother sounded strange on the phone: "Your father never came home." He'd hugged me at the United terminal, then gotten in his car and driven all the way to Arizona, to his mistress. I remember thinking, "How could he not tell me he wasn't coming back?"

But then he did come back. A few months later, he showed up at my graduation — tan, fit, wearing a linen suit, his white hair longer than I'd ever seen it. I never spoke to him about his family sabbatical.

My father died 10 years ago, and to be fair, he was a great deal more than his infidelities. He had a Dickensian childhood — was raised in an orphanage, knew only poverty, never dreamed of going to college. He was highly intelligent (he invented film-processing systems that revolutionized photography), generous, and so handsome that Catherine Deneuve flirted with him and Audrey Hepburn tried to buy him a drink. (He declined; I never learned why.) I take after my father in many ways — I got his dark eyes, his hot temper, his taste for burned toast. And I understand why he cheated: There wasn't enough love in the world to make up for what he'd missed as a child. I just wish I wasn't doomed to repeat it.

The first time I strayed — I messed around on one high-school boyfriend with the next one — I called it "overlap." By college, I was overlapping all the time. My sister called me "boy crazy." Once, when I confided to my mother that I was torn between Peter and Matt, she barely contained her disapproval. "You have your father's sex drive," she said. Ouch, I thought. But, then, a second later: Could this be a genealogical pattern? What happens when the right person comes along?

I got married nearly two years ago to exactly the right person. I fell in love immediately and — cringe — told him so on — cringe, flinch, recoil — our second date. On our wedding day, I missed my dad terribly, like any fatherless bride, but something else was bugging me: Would I be able to respect marriage in a way that my father never could?

The other night at a dinner party, I posed a question to the table: "Could there be a gene for infidelity?" I asked. "No," said my doctor friend Michael through a mouthful of pasta. There is no coil in DNA that makes a person cheat. Period. But surely not all of our proclivities are learned, I said. Some of us are born loving public speaking or being great at languages — it just takes a few years to know it. So what if there is a libido gene? And a gene for impulsiveness? And what if a person has both?

"Sounds like an excuse," replied Michael.

Who knows why people cheat — too little attention, too much attention, fear, boredom? For me, it's always been the excitement principle — the promise of being naked with someone new, the physical draw and the universe willing me to lean in. When you consider the counterforce, the prissy and principled I'm not going to do that, it doesn't seem like a fair fight. But so far it works — fidelity always wins.

I never did kiss Diego, back in the ruins of Palermo. Sure, I wanted to, but it seemed small, childish. Too easy.

And now I have a strategy for ducking temptation. No, I don't imagine my husband's loving face. The notion of telling myself it's not worth it, don't throw it all away, blah, blah, blah, doesn't work for me. Instead, every time I sense it could happen, every moment I find myself attracted to someone and crossing into too flirty, I tell my husband. Because once I confess to him my lust for the hot bartender at the tapas place, I lose interest. Of course, copping to even a potential infidelity is not the most pleasant conversation — when I told my husband about Diego, he was understandably pissed. But then two things happened: He and I became closer, and Diego lost his sheen.

If there's such a thing as a cheating gene, it's not the same as attached earlobes — it predisposes us to a possibility, not a certainty. I'll know when I want to cheat, and because of my take-it-like-cough-medicine method, my husband will, too. I can vacuum the mystery right out of it and make my marriage stronger in the process. Maybe infidelity wasn't the only gene I got from my father — maybe, if I'm lucky, I got his fortitude as well.

More from MSN Lifestyle Site Search: For additional content on cheating, click here.


Danielle Pergament wrote about Iraqi women forced into prostitution for the August '08 issue of Marie Claire. She lives with her husband in New York.
Reprinted with permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.

For My Men

1

A Man Should Be Able To:

1. Give advice that matters in one sentence. I got run out of a job I liked once, and while it was happening, a guy stopped me in the hall. Smart guy, but prone to saying too much. I braced myself. I didn't want to hear it. I needed a white knight, and I knew it wasn't him. He just sighed and said: When nobody has your back, you gotta move your back. Then he walked away. Best advice I ever got. One sentence.

2. Tell if someone is lying. Everyone has his theory. Pick one, test it. Choose the tells that work for you. I like these: Liars change the subject quickly. Liars look up and to their right when they speak. Liars use fewer contractions. Liars will sometimes stare straight at you and employ a dead face. Liars never touch their chest or heart except self-consciously. Liars place objects between themselves and you during a conversation.

3. Take a photo. Fill the frame.

4. Score a baseball game. Scoring a game is an exercise in ciphering, creating a shorthand of your very own. In this way, it's a private language as much as a record of the game. The only given is the numbering of the positions and the use of the diamond to express each batter's progress around the bases. I black out the diamond when a run scores. I mark an RBI with a tally mark in the upper-right-hand corner. Each time you score a game, you pick up on new elements to track: pitch count, balls and strikes, foul balls. It doesn't matter that this information is available on the Internet in real time. Scoring a game is about bearing witness, expanding your own ability to observe.

5. Name a book that matters. The Catcher in the Rye does not matter. Not really. You gotta read.

6. Know at least one musical group as well as is possible. One guy at your table knows where Cobain was born and who his high school English teacher was. Another guy can argue the elegant extended trope of Liquid Swords with GZA himself. This is how it should be. Music does not demand agreement. Rilo Kiley. Nina Simone. Whitesnake. Fugazi. Otis Redding. Whatever. Choose. Nobody likes a know-it-all, because 1) you can't know it all and 2) music offers distinct and private lessons. So pick one. Except Rilo Kiley. I heard they broke up.

2

7. Cook meat somewhere other than the grill.

Buy The Way to Cook, by Julia Child. Try roasting. Braising. Broiling. Slow-cooking. Pan searing. Think ragouts, fricassees, stews. All of this will force you to understand the functionality of different cuts. In the end, grilling will be a choice rather than a chore, and your Weber will become a tool rather than a piece of weekend entertainment.

8. Not monopolize the conversation.

9. Write a letter.

So easy. So easily forgotten. A five-paragraph structure works pretty well: Tell why you're writing. Offer details. Ask questions. Give news. Add a specific memory or two. If your handwriting is terrible, type. Always close formally.

10. Buy a suit.

Avoid bargains. Know your likes, your dislikes, and what you need it for (work, funerals, court). Squeeze the fabric -- if it bounces back with little or no sign of wrinkling, that means it's good, sturdy material. And tug the buttons gently. If they feel loose or wobbly, that means they're probably coming off sooner rather than later. The jacket's shoulder pads are supposed to square with your shoulders; if they droop off or leave dents in the cloth, the jacket's too big. The jacket sleeves should never meet the wrist any lower than the base of the thumb -- if they do, ask to go down a size. Always get fitted.

11. Swim three different strokes. Doggie paddle doesn't count.

12. Show respect without being a suck-up. Respect the following, in this order: age, experience, record, reputation. Don't mention any of it.

13. Throw a punch. Close enough, but not too close. Swing with your shoulders, not your arm. Long punches rarely land squarely. So forget the roundhouse. You don't have a haymaker. Follow through; don't pop and pull back. The length you give the punch should come in the form of extension after the point of contact. Just remember, the bones in your hand are small and easy to break. You're better off striking hard with the heel of your palm. Or you could buy the guy a beer and talk it out.

14. Chop down a tree. Know your escape path. When the tree starts to fall, use it.

15. Calculate square footage. Width times length.

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16. Tie a bow tie.

Step 1: Make a simple knot, allowing slightly more length (one to two inches) on the end of A.

Step 2: Lay A out of the way, fold B into the normal bow shape, and position it on the first knot you made.

Step 3: Drop A vertically over folded end B.

Step 4: Double back A on itself and position it over the knot so that the two folded ends make a cross.

Step 5: The hard part: Pass folded end A under and behind the left side (yours) of the knot and through the loop behind folded end B.

Step 6: Tighten the knot you have created, straightening, particularly in the center.

4

17. Make one drink, in large batches, very well.

When I interviewed for my first job, one of the senior guys had me to his house for a reception. He offered me a cigarette and pointed me to a bowl of whiskey sours, like I was Darrin Stephens and he was Larry Tate. I can still remember that first tight little swallow and my gratitude that I could go back for a refill without looking like a drunk. I came to admire the host over the next decade, but he never gave me the recipe. So I use this:
• For every 750-ml bottle of whiskey (use a decent bourbon or rye), add:
• 6 oz fresh-squeezed, strained lemon juice
• 6 oz simple syrup (mix superfine sugar and water in equal quantities)

To serve: Shake 3 oz per person with ice and strain into chilled cocktail glasses. Garnish with a cherry and an orange slice or, if you're really slick, a float of red wine. (Pour about 1/2 oz slowly into each glass over the back of a spoon; this is called a New York sour, and it's great.)

18. Speak a foreign language. Pas beaucoup. Mais faites un effort.

19. Approach a woman out of his league. Ever have a shoeshine from a guy you really admire? He works hard enough that he doesn't have to tell stupid jokes; he doesn't stare at your legs; he knows things you don't, but he doesn't talk about them every minute; he doesn't scrape or apologize for his status or his job or the way he is dressed; he does his job confidently and with a quiet relish. That stuff is wildly inviting. Act like that guy.

20. Sew a button.

21. Argue with a European without getting xenophobic or insulting soccer.

Once, in our lifetime, much of Europe was approaching cultural and political irrelevance. Then they made like us and banded together into a union of confederated states. So you can always assume that they were simply copying the United States as they now push us to the verge of cultural and political irrelevance.

22. Give a woman an orgasm so that he doesn't have to ask after it.

Otherwise, ask after it.

23. Be loyal. You will fail at it. You have already. A man who does not know loyalty, from both ends, does not know men. Loyalty is not a matter of give-and-take: He did me a favor, therefore I owe him one. No. No. No. It is the recognition of a bond, the honoring of a shared history, the reemergence of the vows we make in the tight times. It doesn't mean complete agreement or invisible blood ties. It is a currency of selflessness, given without expectation and capable of the most stellar return.

24. Know his poison, without standing there, pondering like a dope. Brand, amount, style, fast, like so: Booker's, double, neat.

25. Drive an eightpenny nail into a treated two-by-four without thinking about it.

Use a contractor's hammer. Swing hard and loose, like a tennis serve.

26. Cast a fishing rod without shrieking or sighing or otherwise admitting defeat.

27. Play gin with an old guy. Old men will try to crush you. They'll drown you in meaningless chatter, tell stories about when they were kids this or in Korea that. Or they'll retreat into a taciturn posture designed to get you to do the talking. They'll note your strategies without mentioning them, keep the stakes at a level they can control, and change up their pace of play just to get you stumbling. You have to do this -- play their game, be it dominoes or cribbage or chess. They may have been playing for decades. You take a beating as a means of absorbing the lessons they've learned without taking a lesson. But don't be afraid to take them down. They can handle it.

28. Play go fish with a kid.

You don't crush kids. You talk their ear off, make an event out of it, tell them stories about when you were a kid this or in Vegas that. You have to play their game, too, even though they may have been playing only for weeks. Observe. Teach them without once offering a lesson. And don't be afraid to win. They can handle it.

29. Understand quantum physics well enough that he can accept that a quarter might, at some point, pass straight through the table when dropped.

Sometimes the laws of physics aren't laws at all. Read The Quantum World: Quantum Physics for Everyone, by Kenneth W. Ford.

30. Feign interest. Good place to start: quantum physics.

31. Make a bed.

32. Describe a glass of wine in one sentence without using the terms nutty, fruity, oaky, finish, or kick. I once stood in a wine store in West Hollywood where the owner described a pinot noir he favored as "a night walk through a wet garden." I bought it. I went to my hotel and drank it by myself, looking at the flickering city with my feet on the windowsill. I don't know which was more right, the wine or the vision that he placed in my head. Point is, it was right.

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33. Hit a jump shot in pool. It's not something you use a lot, but when you hit a jump shot, it marks you as a player and briefly impresses women. Make the angle of your cue steeper, aim for the bottommost fraction of the ball, and drive the cue smoothly six inches past the contact point, making steady, downward contact with the felt.

34. Dress a wound. First, stop the bleeding. Apply pressure using a gauze pad. Stay with the pressure. If you can't stop the bleeding, forget the next step, just get to a hospital. Once the bleeding stops, clean the wound. Use water or saline solution; a little soap is good, too. If you can't get the wound clean, then forget the next step, just get to a hospital. Finally, dress the wound. For a laceration, push the edges together and apply a butterfly bandage. For avulsions, where the skin is punctured and pulled back like a trapdoor, push the skin back and use a butterfly. Slather the area in antibacterial ointment. Cover the wound with a gauze pad taped into place. Change that dressing every 12 hours, checking carefully for signs of infection. Better yet, get to a hospital.

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35. Jump-start a car (without any drama). Change a flat tire (safely). Change the oil (once).

36. Make three different bets at a craps table. Play the smallest and most poorly labeled areas, the bets where it's visually evident the casino doesn't want you to go. Simply play the pass line; once the point is set, play full odds (this is the only really good bet on the table); and when you want a little more action, tell the crew you want to lay the 4 and the 10 for the minimum bet.

37. Shuffle a deck of cards.

I play cards with guys who can't shuffle, and they lose. Always.

38. Tell a joke. Here's one:

Two guys are walking down a dark alley when a mugger approaches them and demands their money. They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin taking out their cash. Just then, one guy turns to the other, hands him a bill, and says, "Hey, here's that $20 I owe you."

39. Know when to split his cards in blackjack.

Aces. Eights. Always.

40. Speak to an eight-year-old so he will hear. Use his first name. Don't use baby talk. Don't crank up your energy to match his. Ask questions and wait for answers. Follow up. Don't pretend to be interested in Webkinz or Power Rangers or whatever. He's as bored with that shit as you are. Concentrate instead on seeing the child as a person of his own.

41. Speak to a waiter so he will hear.

You don't own the restaurant, so don't act like it. You own the transaction. So don't speak into the menu. Lift your chin. Make eye contact. All restaurants have secrets -- let it be known that you expect to see some of them.

42. Talk to a dog so it will hear.

Go ahead, use baby talk.

43. Install: a disposal, an electronic thermostat, or a lighting fixture without asking for help. Just turn off the damned main.

44. Ask for help.

Guys who refuse to ask for help are the most cursed men of all. The stubborn, the self-possessed, and the distant. The hell with them.

45. Break another man's grip on his wrist. Rotate your arm rapidly in the grip, toward the other guy's thumb.

46. Tell a woman's dress size.

47. Recite one poem from memory. Here you go:

WHEN YOU ARE OLD

When you are old and gray and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;

How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;

And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.

--William Butler Yeats

48. Remove a stain. Blot. Always blot.

49. Say no.

50. Fry an egg sunny-side up. Cook until the white appears solid...and no longer.

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51. Build a campfire.

There are three components:

1. The tinder -- bone-dry, snappable twigs, about as long as your hand. You need two complete handfuls. Try birch bark; it burns long and hot.

2. The kindling -- thick as your thumb, long as your forearm, breakable with two hands. You need two armfuls.

3. Fuel wood -- anything thick and long enough that it can't be broken by hand. It's okay if it's slightly damp. You need a knee-high stack.

Step 1: Light the tinder, turning the pile gently to get air underneath it.

Step 2: Feed the kindling into the emergent fire with some pace.

Step 3: Lay on the fuel wood. Pyramid, the log cabin, whatever -- the idea is to create some kind of structure so that plenty of air gets to the fire.

52. Step into a job no one wants to do. When I was 13, my dad called me into his office at the large urban mall he ran. He was on the phone. What followed was a fairly banal 15-minute conversation, which involved the collection of rent from a store. On and on, droning about store hours and lighting problems. I kept raising my eyebrows, pretending to stand up, and my dad kept waving me down. I could hear only his end, garrulous and unrelenting. He rolled his eyes as the excuses kept coming. His assertions were simple and to the point, like a drumbeat. He wanted the rent. He wanted the store to stay open when the mall was open. Then suddenly, having given the job the time it deserved, he put it to an end. "So if I see your gate down next Sunday afternoon, I'm going to get a drill and stick a goddamn bolt in it and lock you down for the next week, right?" When he hung up, rent collected, he took a deep breath. "I've been dreading that call," he said. "Once a week you gotta try something you never would do if you had the choice. Otherwise, why are you here?" So he gave me that. And this...

53. Sometimes, kick some ass.

54. Break up a fight. Work in pairs if possible. Don't get between people initially. Use the back of the collar, pull and urge the person downward. If you can't get him down, work for distance.

55. Point to the north at any time.

If you have a watch, you can point the hour hand at the sun. Then find the point directly between the hour hand and the 12. That's south. The opposite direction is, of course, north.

56. Create a play-list in which ten seemingly random songs provide a secret message to one person.

57. Explain what a light-year is. It's the measure of the distance that light travels over 365.25 days.

58. Avoid boredom. You have enough to eat. You can move. This must be acknowledged as a kind of freedom. You don't always have to buy things, put things in your mouth, or be delighted.

59. Write a thank-you note.

Make a habit of it. Follow a simple formula like this one: First line is a thesis statement. The second line is evidentiary. The third is a kind of assertion. Close on an uptick.

Thanks for having me over to watch game six. Even though they won, it's clear the Red Sox are a soulless, overmarketed contrivance of Fox TV. Still, I'm awfully happy you have that huge high-def television. Next time, I really will bring beer. Yours,

60. Be brand loyal to at least one product. It tells a lot about who you are and where you came from. Me? I like Hellman's mayonnaise and Genesee beer, which makes me the fleshy, stubbornly upstate ne'er-do-well that I will always be.

61. Cook bacon.

Lay out the bacon on a rack on a baking sheet. Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes.

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62. Hold a baby.

Newborns should be wrapped tightly and held against the chest. They like tight spaces (consider their previous circumstances) and rhythmic movements, so hold them snug, tuck them in the crook of your elbow or against the skin of your neck. Rock your hips like you're bored, barely listening to the music at the edge of a wedding reception. No one has to notice except the baby. Don't breathe all over them.

63. Deliver a eulogy. Take the job seriously. It matters. Speak first to the family, then to the outside world. Write it down. Avoid similes. Don't read poetry. Be funny.

64. Know that Christopher Columbus was a son of a bitch. When I was a kid, because I'm Italian and because the Irish guys in my neighborhood were relentless with the beatings on St. Patrick's Day, I loved the very idea of Christopher Columbus. I loved the fact that Irish kids worshipped some gnome who drove all the rats out of Ireland or whatever, whereas my hero was an explorer. Man, I drank the Kool-Aid on that guy. Of course, I later learned that he was a hand-chopping, land-stealing egotist who sold out an entire hemisphere to European avarice. So I left Columbus behind. Your understanding of your heroes must evolve. See Roger Clemens. See Bill Belichick.

65-67. Throw a baseball over-hand with some snap. Throw a football with a tight spiral. Shoot a 12-foot jump shot reliably.

If you can't, play more ball.

68. Find his way out of the woods if lost. Note your landmarks -- mountains, power lines, the sound of a highway. Look for the sun: It sits in the south; it moves west. Gauge your direction every few minutes. If you're completely stuck, look for a small creek and follow it downstream. Water flows toward larger bodies of water, where people live.

69. Tie a knot.

Square knot: left rope over right rope, turn under. Then right rope over left rope. Tuck under. Pull. Or as my pack leader, Dave Kenyon, told me in a Boy Scouts meeting: "Left over right, right over left. What's so fucking hard about that?"

70. Shake hands. Steady, firm, pump, let go. Use the time to make eye contact, since that's where the social contract begins.

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71. Iron a shirt. My uncle Tony the tailor once told me of ironing: Start rough, end gently.

72. Stock an emergency bag for the car.

Blanket. Heavy flashlight. Hand warmers. Six bottles of water. Six packs of beef jerky. Atlas. Reflectors. Gloves. Socks. Bandages. Neosporin. Inhaler. Benadryl. Motrin. Hard candy. Telescoping magnet. Screwdriver. Channel-locks. Crescent wrench. Ski hat. Bandanna.

73. Caress a woman's neck. Back of your fingers, in a slow fan.

74. Know some birds. If you can't pay attention to a bird, then you can't learn from detail, you aren't likely to appreciate the beauty of evolution, and you don't have a clue how birdlike your own habits may be. You've been looking at them blindly for years now. Get a guide.

75. Negotiate a better price. Be informed. Know the price of competitors. In a big store, look for a manager. Don't be an asshole. Use one phrase as your mantra, like "I need a little help with this one." Repeat it, as an invitation to him. Don't beg. Ever. Offer something: your loyalty, your next purchase, even your friendship, and, with the deal done, your gratitude.

HOW MANY OF THESE SKILLS DO YOU HAVE?

prayers for my grandmother

yesterday, my cousin called to tell me that my paternal grandmother was having more health problems. About 2 years ago, my grandmother had a stroke in her home that put her in a wheel chair. She has limited range of motion on the right side of her body. She can't walk on her own, and she needs assistance to do just about everything. but THANK GOD she still here.

yesterday, her doctor said they found a lump in her breast. They have to schedule a biopsy to tell what it is. I'm super nervous about this. My grandmother has never been the healthiest person. She eats a LOT of junk food! I mean she has cases of soda, lil debbie cakes, fruit roll ups etc. I think she's allergic to fruits and vegetables.

Even after she had a stroke she still didn't really change her eating habits. My aunt moved back home to keep an eye on her but my aunt works so when she would leave my granny would send my grandfather out for fattening stuff. When my aunt found out, ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE! she dont' play, so she threw all the food out and bought veggies, fruits and other healthy stuff. So we were all tryna talk to her and get her on the right path, now i see where my hardheadedness comes from! :-)

I'm hoping that this lump isn't serious. I'm asking any and everyone that passes by this blog to say a quick prayer for my grandmother.

Gucci Mane punches Mac Breezy

If you're like me, you didn't know who in the hell Mac Breezy is. I thought it was some guy. WRONG! it's a girl. yep, that's right, Gucci Mane punches a girl in the face!

The sad thing is she's ok with that. SMDH!
Watch the video below!

Thank you Jesus!

Hallelujah!

Anyone that's come across this blog, knows that i've been going thru hell for almost a year. Well, I FINALLY got a break! I gotta JOB!! :-) *woop woop* I've been out of a job for quite sometime. Being broke ain't no fun. I've learned some very valuable lessons in these dark days. I've learned that I way more stronger than I thought. I've always known that I was my mother's child (she's a very strong woman) but I didn't know how alike we were.

I haven't really written about EVERYTHING that's been happening cause, I don't know ya'll like that! LOL No one really knows all that I've been through. It's between me and Jesus!

I just want to say to anyone out there that's been through some shit, hold on! Just hold on! I know it's not much and when you're at your lowest you don't wanna hear that. (Iknow i didn't) but it's the truth. You will feel like giving up, giving in but don't. Don't let folks tell you that you need to give up either. NOBODY I had to stop talking to my mom for a while because she was being just so negative. It'll be hard, it'll feel unbearable when you're at your lowest but you just gotta stay prayed up!!!

Ok. that's enough of me rambling! LOL come back to see me soon! Kisses

GTFOH!...Invisible tattoos?!?!

Yeah. you read that right! Invisible tattoos are newest thing to hit the tattoo world.

The other day my mom and I talked about my tats. I told her I wanted more (i have only 2). she told me that tats were "the devil's work". SMH Ilove my mom but the things she says sometimes. Anyway I started searching around on the net for some inspiration for my next tat which I will most likely be getting really soon! Hopefully.

I came across this article about invisible tattoos. I thought, "hmmmmmmmm, this should be interesting!" I was right. These invisible tattoos can only be seen using UV or blacklight. It uses a special UV tattoo ink. At first thought I thot, COOL! Then I read the pros and cons about the UV ink and you should too! Click here for that list

Would you get an invisible tattoo, if there was no risk involved?

Controlled Chaos

I heard that phrase the other day and I had a light bulb moment. aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh. controlled chaos, eh? That describes my life perfectly right now. Soooooo much has been going on and so little at the same time, if that makes any sense. Let me explain, a lot of things that I didn't want to happen haven been happening and nothing that I NEED to happen has taken place.

If it wasn't for God's control, I would probably be in a crazy home somewhere. The devil has been working overtime in my life and i'm not sure why. But I hold on and I stay prayed up and I know that this storm in my life is just temporary and something bigger and better is gonna present itself.

For almost a year my life has been an absolute hell. things have gone from bad to worse and i'm afraid that the worst is around the corner ....on that note let me take a moment to say a little prayer (take 5 mins)

ok, anyway i'm in a stable environment, (i hope) maybe i'll be able to blog and talk more. I've gotta get back to being the old me. I've gained weight, lost hair and came really close to losing my mind. but thank God I'm still here!!!!!!!!!

So I want to say to anyone that passes by this blog, please say a prayer for me. It's much appreciated.

peace and love

Brutha

For my first entry for MRM i'm reviewing an album that shocked me. I didn't expect this album to be all that good. I mean, don't get me wrong the boys can sing but with all the drama they had going on from there TV show on BET, i didn't think they were gonna hold it together long enough to make something worth listening to! Boy was I wrong! Click here for a quick bio.

It's very rare that I put in a cd and just let it play from beginning to end. I mean my ipod is full of playlists that I created. I think I have at least 30. The smoothness of their voices can damn near put you in a trance. Boyz 2 Men status indeed.

The album is filled with content you would expect from a group of 5 young men! Women, women and women. duh! Their first sing "Can't hear the music" ft. Fabulous is an uptempo song about how he sings " I can't hear the music cause I'm focused on you" I think it's kinda cheesy but a good song. I bump it in my car, but I wouldn't dance to it in the club.

My favorite song on the album is "Make you love it" I love the song until like the last 30 seconds when Jazze Pha comes in messing it up with his signature ad lib "Oh boy!" ugh.

My second favorite song on the album is "She's Gone". It's a slow ballad about how he did wrong and he can't get her back cause she's fed up. The boys croon "It's too late she's gone"! Ladies we know how that feels don't we?! We take a lot but when we gone, we gone!! Below is a video of the boys singing acapella! Check it out!!!

Rating= 4 SNAPS IN A CIRCLE!!!

Music Review Monday

Hi Everyone!!

This is my first entry for Music Review Monday! I figure since I'm finding and listening to music all the time. I wanted to review some of the music I been bumping in my ipod! I may review a whole album or I may review some singles. I don't know what i'm gonna do I'm just asking you to check back and leave comments!

I may review something old or something new. either way it may be something you may want to check out. I hope you check it out!!!!

Disclaimer: I don't know anything about music, other than I know what I like. Sometimes, I don't even know why I like it. It's just my opinion, folx. For entertainment purposes only!

Rating Scale

0 snaps in a circle= deleting off my ipod, NOW!
1 snap in a circle= keeping just a few songs
2 snaps in a circle=will keep whole album, but will only play a few songs
3 snaps in a circle= will play and keep entire album, sporadically,
4 snaps in a circle will play and keep entire album, frequently (probably on repeat!!)
5 snaps in a circle= It's probably a Jay-Z album so don't worry bout this! LOL

J. Hud singing National Anthem

She did that! Sang hunny Sang!

Untitled

Loves this pic of Obama. He looks so pleased with himself and happy! Alright Young B.O. get to work!!!

Black Love

 Is it weird that watching the Obamas makes me want to fall in love? They have renewed my faith that there is true love out there. Damn I love these ppl!

Embedded Video

History

I haven't been able to keep my eyes dry for more than an hour over the last couple of days! I have been filled with so much pride and joy over the history that is being made on this day. Like many of you, I voted for Obama because I believed he was the best man for the job. I didn't vote for him on the sole fact that he was an African American.

Anyway, I'm proud of the progress that this country has made and I'm glad that I could be a part of it. I know that it won't be an overnight success but I have faith in the candidate that I chose, that he will do his best to help this country along!

Go Obama! May God bless and keep him!

blah blah blah

What's happening folks?!

I've been gone for a minute and will be gone from here for a while longer. Lots of unnecessary shit has been happening in my life causing me to evaluate and question everything! Which isn't so bad, cause I needed to.

I hope that everything is going well for you and that your 2009 is a wonderful as you want it to be. I miss blogging and talking about stupid stuff but this is my life for now. :-(

I ask that anyone that finds this blog, closes their eyes and send up a prayer for me, cause I need it!

PEACE AND BLESSINGS!